Happy Fall Yall

Ok, so the Autumnal gods have thrown up on the outside of my house. I don’t really understand my new compulsion to decorate my house for every season. Someone is going to have to stop me when I begin to experiment with my Kwanza decor. Well, I thought I had decided that I was, under no circumstances, going to decorate for fall. I mean, we live in Atlanta where it goes from “Hot as the Devil’s Netheregion” to “Holy SHIT, I Thought Winters in the South Are Supposed to Be MILD.”

Fall in Atlanta causes me to do crazy things. It causes me to go to craft stores. Yeah, well it was mostly on the urgings of QueenB. The next thing I know, here I am at Michael’s craft store where they have those goofy, tiny carts wandering around following my mother with a look of shock and bewilderment in my eyes. Apparently, fall causes me to spend $100 or bright orange and red fake leaves to put all over the front of my house. It does look all “warm and inviting and autumnal!”

Fall also causes me to do lots of other crazy things. It causes me to become obsessed with my dog, Dolce’s Halloween costume. After many hours searching on-line and weighing the benefits of each costume I got frustrated and went to Petsmart, without dog. There, they were down to two costumes, which only serve to tell me that this fall madness hits others as well. I thought, “Damn, why didn’t I bring dog to let her choose.”, and then I thought, “You, yes you, are out of your DAMN mind” Well, Dolce was either going to be a pumpkin or cow. The udders sold me. I mean, who, WHO can resist a dog with udders… A cow it is!!! Pictures soon to come! Now, if any of you have suggestions as to how I could get Snake to dress in a cow costume…

Fall causes me to want hot apple cider. I mean, WTF! Cider in any capacity grosses me out. But, it is chilly, so hey! Cider it is. Fall causes me to eat turkey legs, renaissance festive style. What, would possess a young lady, dressed in her Saturday best, to walk around, in public, eating a GIANT turkey leg??? Yes, something is severely wrong with me, but I need to run and dress up the dog so I can take her to the pumpkin patch to take pictures in her new costume. “Dolce! Say MOOOOO.”